Baby Name Poll

Well, we have come up with one name we like and I would like everyones opinion. We have been looking and looking and so far this is the only one we like. Please tell us what you think and if you have any other name idea's.

Nicholas

Meaning - "Victorious People"
It is Greek.

So let us know what you think and others think.

Thank You.

Thanksgiving was good

How was everyones Thanksgiving? Ours was pretty good. First of all we had a surprise show up on our door Wednesday. It was Grass's brother from Vancouver, WA. He took us out for dinner, gave Grass a early Christmas gift and stayed the night. I was awake at 5am. I made a huge breakfast for the guys and they were barely hungry. I made hash browns, eggs, sausage, bacon, and pancakes. I guess they were still pretty tired. I then made a salad and 2 apple pies. One to take to the neighbour and another to take to our Grandparents. We went and we talked, ate, too somepictures and visited and left. We had company coming so we had to leave early. Our company had a change of plans so Grass's Dad and step mom came up to see the house later that night. God I hope that don't bite us in the ass later. The next morning we had friends from Utah come and visit and then that night liljsm and the kids came. So it was full of family and friends. It was nice. I thought we would be all alone the whole week. I was wrong. Boy was I tired after though. It was all worth it. Now we just have to get ready for Christmas and the baby.

What the hell is wrong with me?

I know my hormones are out of control and it is normal during pregnancy to go through some highs and lows. But when the nurse tells you that you are prone to have Post pardon Depression and you should talk to someone if you get down, I begin to think I am not normal. I am scaring myself. I can't talk to anyone about this, I am even scared to blog about it. One - no one really cares, or Two - people will be upset with me. Three - they will misunderstand. I am starting to question everything about myself. I am also feeling really selfish lately, wondering what this baby with do to my marriage, we are in the best place we have ever been and I am so worried that it will end. Instead I should be loving every minute. I am getting very depressed because I am starting to get big and so many people were so happy I had lost the weight. Selfishly I don't want to gain any weight. Not one pound.
I have this horrible dreaded feeling that comes over me. I usually get really excited and motivated when an occation is coming up. Thanksgiving is in 2 days. We are going to our Grandparents, and Jsm will be in town, we may not see him but I usually get excited even if I don't get to see him. And I have no motivation or excitement. I just feel dread.
I was asked what I wanted a boy or a girl, I have always wanted a little girl, but I am having a boy, I am really, really trying to accept it, but it is so hard, what the hell is wrong with me. I keep asking myself what kind of mother will I be, I will have nothing in common, nothing to teach him, nothing to learn from him, and then I go to "oh my god, what if I can't love him". This is not normal, I know it can't be. I need a cast iron frying pan so I can severely beat myself with it. Knock some sense in to me. When I think about all this I just want to ball. I wake up in the middle of the night or in the morning and I feel this way and I just want to go back to sleep so I don't feel anymore. The only time I feel better is when I am doing something with my husband. Even then he has to push me. I have no complaints about work except the 9 hour shifts, I have asked for a change and maybe it will happen. I have had bleeding a few times after a couple of 9 hour shifts. I feel horrible about staying home and not working but I feel better not taking any chances when I have a complication, no matter how small. God this must tell me that I do care, and that my other thoughts and feelings are irrashional. You would think.
Well I am so fed up of typing. Bye and Happy Thanksgiving to all and enjoy your turkey, family and friends, they are so precious and a lot of us do not really have any family or friends.

So you wana know??

This morning was the ultrasound. 9 am bright and early. It took over an hour looking and making sure everything was there that was suppose to be. In that whole hour that baby had it's knee's up to its chest and wouldn't let us take a peek. The doctor came in after awhile just to make sure everything was good. It was.
Anyways the doctor pressed really hard on my tummy to get the baby to move and reposition, and he did. They got a glimpse of some "Outdoor Plumbing". Its a boy!! Not a guarantee, they told us to keep our receipts just in case. He wouldn't stay still long enough to get a picture of that
though. He put his knees right back up.


















He weighs in at 1 lbs for now. The top picture is a profile of his head to the right and his hand is up above.
The bottom left picture is his face. And the right is his arms and hands in a fist.

It is an "IT"

OK ok so I said I would update the next day and I didn't. FIrst I was really pissed and disappointed and second, I was running for 4 days straight. Can you tell it is 2:42am.
Ok so Thursday comes and we get to the Doctors office with the camera, they ask us, "did we have you schedule your ultrasound yet across the street"? I replied "no, no one told me we had to do anything". So ya we go over at 4:30pm and of course Friday was booked solid and well Monday Mat didn't have off, so we will be going in Tuesday. I have to drink 32 oz of water between 7am and 8am and not pee, are they crazy? I pee every 20 minutes lately, and just laughing and I am just about peeing myself, and they wana push on my tummy with my bladder full? Hope they are expecting a waterfall!! I know they are used to it.
Friday was Brian's wedding. We thought our friends Rex and Nicole were going to be at our house first thing in the morning before they had to go to the Temple and so we were up and ready for company at 7am and no one showed or called. We got to the temple at 12:15 to take pictures and I was so mad. I guess it was my old fault, I must have misunderstood Brain. I thought he asked us to take pictures of them, but that it would be seperate from everyone else taking pics. Nope I had to get thier picture behind everyone else and print it for the reception. Hell that was just about impossible, not to mention totally uncomfotable because I was on Temple ground (yes stupid I know). Anyhow he told us he wanted the temple in the background and I was like that is impossible that close to the building to get it in the background, I had to stand way back. They were so small in the picture. Oh well it gets worse.
We went across the River and attended a Luncheon. It was yummy!! And after he picked the pictures off the camera he wanted for that evening. And then told us we had to be there an hour to hour and a half early. I was a little annoyed because that gave us not even 2 hours to run home, get the pictures cropped and printed, print the program he had just gave us, run to Walmart, Eastgate and stop in Rigby and then get to St. Anthony. Well we did it alright, WITHOUT THE DAMN PICTURES!!! We forgot them on the freaken desk running out to try and make it on time. GRRRR!!! I wanted to hide in the car and cry, I was so disappointed in myself, one simple task and I couldn't even do it. Well he wasn't mad. Oh and because we ran out of the house I didn't have time to read the program we printed and there were so many spelling and grammer errors. I felt like such an idiot. Well Katy's kids did a little performance for everyone and then we ate again, my kind of wedding, food, food and more food.
All in all it was nice. Rex and Nicole got to our house about 15 minutes after us, about 9:30pm. Got the boys to sleep, we had hot cocoa, apple cider and cake I made and then played Rummy 500 untill 2am. I had to work the next day and they had to be on the road at 9:30am.
Got up and I was sick, Mat told me to rest as long as I could and he would make breakfast, he started and Nicole took over for him and finished, he felt bad. I then rushed out of the house, noticed my oil was low, filled it and then got 1/4 way to work already late and noticed I didn't have my smock and access card. Ran all the way back home. Finally got to work 3 minutes late and punched in and "Badge rejected" What the hell. Looked at the schedule and I don't work.
Grrrr so mad.

Today is the day!!!

I am 20 weeks and today we going to find out the gender of the baby. We are so freaking stoked. Mat's Health insurance through his work has a program for expected parents that is free and I signed up the other day. Everytime I need help or a question there is a number I call to speak to a specialized nurse. The same nurse assists me throughout my pregnancy. She calls once a month and keeps in contact with my doctor. Anyhow I think it really rocks and helps me feel a lot better, she explains things that my doctor doesn't seem to have the time to explain.
Anyhow we get to see the baby today. After if we see the gender we are going shopping for a few things. The nurse had advised me to pick out a few things to get my mind off the depression that might be setting in. She said if I start doing more for the baby, I would have something to look forward to that is positive instead of obsessing and worrying about things. I have a very high percentage of getting post pardum depression and she wants to steer me away from potentially getting it. Anyhow I need to get ready for work and then for the company we are expecting and the wedding tomorrow. I will obviously blog tonight or tomorrow with the news!! Oh my gosh I am so excited I just wana talk to everybody!!

A really good night.

Last night was Mat's work party. They held it at The Mountain River Ranch in Ririe, Idaho.
Every other year it has been at a stiff country club. I was quite impressed that the company actually took at look at the employee's and what they might enjoy.
Anyhow we were to arrive before 6pm, to catch the wagon wide to the dinner hall. We had just made it in time. I don't know why we weren't there ealier like we usually are. Anyway, horses were freaking huge but beautiful. They are a breed of Draft horses. A Percheron Draft Horse. They are made for pulling, and packing. I was just in amazement in thier size and beauty. I want a few!!
We all meet in a warm building waiting for everyone to arrive so we could ride out together. There were 2 wagons. We got on the one with Katy and Bullwinkle (Horse's names). For some reason Katy needed a little extra encouragement to pull us and keep pulling us and well Bullwinkle was literly full of hot air. We decided he must have had a grain pail full of Beans before everyone else. He kept us hiding our faces in our jackets the whole ride. I guess beauty comes with a stinky price.
We all climbed off and quickly rushed inside to get warm and sat down. The disappointing thing was they didn't have hot chocolate. When you think of a evening wagon or sleigh ride in the cold crisp air you think of HOT CHOCOLATE!! I was soooo cold and all they had was soda, beer, wine and water. BRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!! So I had a pepsi, and then another, and another and another, I don't know what was wrong with me, a pepsi usually last me all night. I drank so much pepsi me front teeth were aching after.
Once we all got settled the owners got on stage and talked a bit introducing himself and weloming us and then informing us that each table had to sing to "She will be coming around Mountain River Ranch". We not only had to sing, we had to do something different from the other tables to be able to eat. The best got to eat first and obviously the worst last. He asked if anyone wanted to sing a favorite song before we got started and Joe (some idiot from work) got up on stage and began to sing "I am a Little Tea Pot". It was funny. Anyhow our table came in second. Not bad. There was Potato Salad, Corn on the Cob, Baked Beans (can you beleive it? Bullwinkle left us some) Steak or BBQ Chicken and Garlic Bread. And for dessert was Huckleberry Ice Cream. Yummy, it reminded me of Colleen. The whole night reminded me of her. After Dinner; our company paid for our own entertainment instead of the Ranches because so many people had already seen the shows. So we had a Hypnotist. Mat volunteered after much persuation. But he was unsuccessful in going under, he couldn't relax because of his back pain. Anyhow the guy got everyone to act like an ass pretty much and it was hilarious, I had to make a run for the bathroom, I was litteraly about the piss my pants and just made it. Ehhh never had that happen before, I guess thats what pregnancy does. One thing he did was get the woman to think Keith (the plant manager), Alen (the plant owner) and Monte (maintance guy, bigggg guy) to think they were famous hot looking guys. They freaking climbed on them and started kissing them. I was gonna die laughing. I was recording the show in the beginning but had to stop soon after because I couldn't hold the camera still. I was laughing to much. One of the girls was so relaxed she fell of her freaking chair and had to be caught before rolling off the stage. The woman that owned the ranch was a volunteer too and she was very proper mannered and the guy tried to get her to announce that she "Had a wedgie and it felt great" when ever he said "Mountain River Ranch", she refused to say it but totally hid her head everytime he said it. Anyhow the show was good.
After the show the Company Owner got up and gave his yearly speach and prayer and then announced the 5 people that have been with the company for 5 years or more. Mat was one of them.. He gave Mat a $$$Hundred Dollar Bill and a new sweet looking jacket with the company logo. He than thanked certain people and there were other awards given and then every employee got a demin shirt with the company logo. All in all it was the best company get together ever. They took a poll of what we liked better, Country Club or the Ranch and we obviously said the Ranch. So from now on they are going to do more of these kind of events.
I am so very proud of My husband; he has worked his ass off and needed to be thanked and given some encouragement. He deserved that money and jacket and I can see it makes him feel good to be achknowledged. We had such a good time. Even though it was snowing when we got out.

November is already here. Last night was Halloween and yup you guessed it no trick or treaters. That's ok we wouldn't have heard them come to the door because we were in the garage bathing our dogs any how.
Suzy got hit by a car on Saturday. It was so wired, the door bell rang, I answered it and it was a kid wanted pennies for something. He had an adult driving a van and him door to door. Right before he came I saw all 3 dogs and they were fine. After he left I decided to take a shower and as soon as I got out and dressed, (10 minutes) all the dogs were gone. Vanished. It was starting to pore out and I wanted to get the in the garage before I left for work so I know they would be dry and warm and I could not find them anywhere, I looked everywhere and called for them for 20 minutes. No one had seen them... Well I was gonna be late for work if I didn't go. I ended up going for work to early so I ran errands and then went to work and got home after 6pm. There was Gizmo and Lizzy scared as shit in the garage but no Suzy. I was like what the hell.
Went in side and there were 5 messages. "We have found Suzy, she has been hit by a car". My heart dropped to my stomach, my throat swelled and tears fell. Oh my god, poor Mat I thought to myself.. I listen for the rest of the messages. "She seems to be ok, just a few cuts and is in shock.... She is at the vet in Rigby...." A shy of relief, but yet I was like what the hell still, hit by a car? Where? How? We live in a court!! I called the number the kind people left.
apparently Suzy was on Bone Road alone. A bicycler saw a car hit her, they could not take her on the bike so they flagged a car down, those people in the car brought suzy to their house, put a heat lamp on her and proceeded to attempt to contact us, she had a tag. OMG (when we moved here I was like these dogs need tags in the country, someone finds them they will know where they belong) Thank the freaking lord I did that. Anyhow they called the Rigby Vet because she had her rabies done and had that tag too. They brought her in and just kept trying to call us until I got home and returned the call.
So we have been racking our brain on how she got to Bone road and why was Gismo and Lizzy back home when I got home. Hmmm. Well I think the dogs decided they liked following the little boy door to door and once he was done where ever he was, Gismo and Lizzy decided to come home. Most likely running, well Suzy being old, somewhat blind and deaf she probably was left behind and got lost. Heck I have no idea but I know that we are so very lucky to have all three of them back home safe and sound. And we have decided Suzy is really a cat in a dogs body because she has 9 lives!!!! She has been hit now by two cars, caught under a tractor, MAt accidentally hitting her in the driveway, two major ifections, she is deaf, blind and well freaking ancient!!!!! BUT WE LOVE HER TO DEATH!!!
Nothing much happened in October I think. I have a week away from being 5 months and finding out the gender of the baby. I have lost a total of 30 lbs and gained 2+ lbs for the baby. I am in normal clothes, yea that's right no more damn PLUS SIZE. And I am not only in normal clothes, I am in Large not X-LARGE. It is freaking amazing!!
A lot of people have noticed, the only one that hasn't is Mat. I guess cause he says he see me everyday and doesn't notice, how do you not notice 30 lbs less of me. That is a freaking toddler.
Anyhow, I am feeling better and better everyday. I realized the pills for my RLS was what was keeping my up and making my legs even worse. So I stopped taking them and now I am finally sleeping after 4 months of no sleep. Down fall, I have to see a neurologist for the RLS. I hate more freaking doctors. Poke and prod at me, call me crazy and everything else. I know whets wrong I have freaking RLS. Just give me something to help me deal with it and I'll be fine. Otherwise leave me alone. I have had, seen, taking enough, doctors, specialist and medication for the whole IF area.
Looks like we will be having company on the 11th, Rex and Niolce and the kids will be here and then in December Ben and his family of 5 will be here. OMG that's a lot!! I can do it though I did it last year with 4 of them. BREATH!!! I love company when it comes and love when it goes. I am just really claustrophobic and well everyone knows it a clean freak. Family is good, company is good. I love family and friends. And then it is relax time and prep time before the baby comes.
Work is going good, still no complaints, yes JSM that is right no complaints still. I kick ass in IPH, I know its a dead end job and my freaking cat could probably do it with his eyes closed, but I still think I am good at it. This Friday we are going to Moutain River Ranch for Mat's work party. I think it will be really fun, even though no one talks to us. And then on the 11th is Brian's wedding. That will be fun too I hope, I am not Mormon so I have to adapt to the simple wedding, I am used to huge party weddings back home. LOL!!
Mat is doing good, appeartly he asked for a raise at work and they told him it looks good, apparently they made quite a bit, a whole butt load of money this year and he will be getting a raise in the new year, a substantial raise. And the best part the other supervisor will be leaving hopefully in June and then Mat will be the lead Sup and he will be making money he never thought possible. But he this is all talk until it happens RIGHT!! I guess it is something to look forward to but not count on. It will be even sweeter if the company pays to have his teeth fixed too!! If he becomes the only SUP. He will be working a whole lot more. I hope he wants that and is ready for that. He would be pulled left, right, up down, you know what I mean. LOL
Well Grandma is going to Utah for Thanksgiving this year, so we are alone again, well we weren't totally alone last year, JSM has us over last year, YUMMY!!! Now he is gone. :(
Well I think I have typed my figures out.